What a waste of time!

Since Clomid was not the answer for me, the RE moved me onto Gonal*f. I was stinking scared of that little needle. I think it took me well over an hour to work up the nerve and stick it in my belly! I survived, and it got easier each night, thank God. :) So away I go, every night for 5 nights I stick myself in the tummy with this needle.

It was time to look and see what we could see, this time I knew what we didn't want to see, and eagerly awaited seeing the screen. There were good things happening, lots of little ones growing! Relief! Gave the news to DH and we were feeling good. That night the nurse calls and has me lower my dosage of the Gonal, she says my E2 number is going up nicely, and they will see me in 2 days. Next US rolls around, and holy cow, we are outta control here! Much to their surprise and mine, I had developed about 28 follicles, and most of them were growing at the same rate! Yikes! I hear them mention the word cancel again, and I about lost it! I held it together until I got outside and made the call to DH again. After my bloodwork came in they lowered my dosage again, and then told me my E2 level was really high, they wanted to see me again in the morning....off I go, reluctantly, I didn't want to hear them say canceled again. After more blood work and another US, I went home and waited for the news. To my fear and delight, they wanted me to do the trigger shot tonight! That was quite an ordeal, I couldn't come to grips with my DH using my butt as a dart board and after fighting with him and crying once again, I assumed the position and...Poke! Holy Crap that scared me so bad I jerked, and the needle came out..so he had to do it again, I held still much better that time!

So it was time to do this, DH did his thing, and I climbed on the table and waited for them to come in...I was in extreme pain, my ovaries were huge, and I could barely walk. When the RE came in the room he could tell I was in bad shape, and proceeded to give me the scare of my life. Are you sure you want to do this, there is a high risk of multiples, and you need to decide right now if you are willing to reduce. I instantly know what the answer is to that, Um nope! With tears streaming down my face we made the decision to go forward, after all we were dealing with a low count, and he couldn't tell me the odds of it really happening with a count that low.
Needless to say this cycle was a bust, and so were the next 2! I can't believe they continued to have me go through this, and that I went along with it! I was naive and hopeful, but this obviously wasn't going to work. The last attempt, gave me an unwelcome Christmas present, and at that point I knew we were done.

No more IUI's, it was a waste of our time, and emotions. Shame on you Dr. for putting us through that!