First Moments in the Life of a 26 Week Preemie

The first time I saw this I realized just how touchy it would be as to whether Marlo would live or not.  In our hearts we knew how fragile life was after just losing a son a year before; but this, this took my breath away and turned me into a weeping pile on the floor.

It was the day we brought her home from the hospital that I finally was able to read all about it in her summary discharge notes.  The following made my heart heavy and gripped me with fear:

Under the Resuscitation Part of the summary:

Infant was limp and without respiratory effort at birth.  Infant was taken to stabilization, wrapped in polyethylene warp.  Initial heart rate was 60.  PPV via mask was immediately initiated.  Color slightly improved and she intermittently cried.  She required FiO2 100%.  Heart rate improved to 110-120 but was weak and difficult to osculate so chest compressions were started at 06:50 and given for less than 30 seconds after which heart rate was confirmed to be at 130's by monitor.  Apgar scores at 1 min: 2  Apgar score at 5 min: 6  Apgar score at 10 min: 9  Infant was intubated at 9 mins of life and given Curosurf, and labs were obtained.  


Her life so very precious, could have been lost so easily that morning, and every morning after for a good 2 months.  She was born weighing just 1lb 11oz.  Do you know how small that is???  Unless you've seen it you may not be able to comprehend, but she was so tiny.  My husbands wedding ring fit all the way up her leg with plenty of extra room, and could hold both arms with wiggle room.  Take your wedding ring off right now and just look at that.  She was so small when I held her, she felt weightless.

She was limp and could not breathe at birth.  Yet, within moments, she cried intermittently.  With the help of the doctors and nurses life and death collided and we now sit and thank God for the miracle He alone enabled through their hands.  She was tiny but mighty.  I look at her in amazement, one year later, a gift of love and hope.  She's stolen our hearts.  She has been our healing after rain.

After 17 weeks and 2 days in the hospital that warm September night, I read those words as she sat in my arms at home for the very first time.  I held her close always, but that night I held her more close to my heart with a desperation from deep inside.  It was my desperate attempt to take it all in, as if I hadn't done it enough in the past weeks...we all had.  But, in that moment, God's goodness and love for us was more apparent than it had ever been.

The life of a 26 weeker:  She changed us all and gave us hope.  The gift continues on and on today.

Marlo Joy at one week old.  1lb. 11oz.  My Might Marlo!