I start a list in the morning, and as I knock things off, the list never shrinks as I figure out more and more to add, to said ridiculous list. It's overwhelming at times, and though I rarely feel like this, I feel ill equipped to handle the mounting to-dos that are coming my way.
That's when a friend asked me to put on my Super Woman cape....
I always wear that cape. ALWAYS.
That is, until lately. It's lost, and I do not know where to find it. Believe me, I've searched high and low, and have turned closets and storage rooms upside down. Looked under the mattress, in the laundry, and in the kids toy box, to no avail.
Here's the thing: I think someone stole it! It's not here, or over there, or anywhere.
Super Woman seems to have left the building, much to my dismay.
I'm just not feeling it, as much as I hate to admit it. At some point my hope is that the cape will magically reappear and my super powers will resume to full capacity, but, for today, I am nearly running on empty. Still running though!
I've gone from the cape, to I think I can, I think I can....
Hmmm......
I'm beginning to think that may be the point of the cape, without it, there probably is no, I think I can.
Maybe, it's been there all along, a little tattered, and a bit worn, barely visible to all, but me?? After all who can see their own back?
Little secret being let out right there, regardless of what we tell our kids about having eyes on the back of our heads. It only refers to seeing them and what their little grubby paws might be getting into, and not in our Momness.
Yes, that is a word. It how Moms win and being awesome Moms, with eyes everywhere. We put on our Momness, hence eyes that see sooooooo very much, except for how amazing we are everyday.
We are our own worst critics, and very rarely feel we are enough, when there is so much to be enough for. We wear many hats, along with the boogers, spit up, tears and sometimes evidence of ouchies that share what our days have held. It's like a book, written all over our shirts. It's in the diapers that have been changed, the messes that have been cleaned, the dishes we wash, the meals cooked, and the mountains of laundry that are never ending. The last minute changes to schedules and accommodating them, lunches packed, broken hearts mended, errands run, bills paid, and most importantly, prayers said almost continually for safety, sanity, and making it through another day.
Our rewards are sloppy kisses, hugs and I love you Mommy's when they are young. Things we certainly miss as they get older as their independence becomes more important that those slobber kisses that they seemed to be so willing to dish out, but all too quickly they grow and we watch and pray that the bubble we had prayed around them only grows larger with them. As the things of life come and go, and the changes continue, we find we are looking a little harder for ways to feel we have had a winning moment of accomplishment. Our Momness feels a little less then stellar some days.
I suppose that sums up me for today, and very likely tomorrow. This is just a short little blip, that will all too soon be over. I know at the end of this, that cape will probably be back in all it's shining glory. It's the I think I can mode that might indicate all is well, that this too shall pass, and that cape really might be back there flapping in the wind.
I think I may have found my cape.
There she blows! |